Childcare Options Disappearing for Middle-Class America

I've worked as a nanny off and on for a few years now. I love kids, and I love the one-on-one connection you get to form when working for a specific family. But it's definitely a far cry from paying the bills.

There are many middle class families that need childcare. But for those with both parents working to make minimum wage, it's impossible for them to pay a sitter a livable wage.

I once had a woman request my services for her pre-school age child. She made me an offer, and after I divided it into an hourly rate, it boiled down to a whopping $1.79 an hour. I couldn't fault her though. A single parent working in fast food and trying to provided all the basic necessities of life for her family can only afford so much. But with a heavy heart, I had to turn her down, because I have my own family to think of. It does make me wonder, what did she do about child care in the end?

It seems middle-class parents are forced to make some very unfair decisions. They have to choose between over crowded, understaffed daycare centers that accept DHS vouchers, the private care taker offering an affordable rate, but with too many children in her care, or the option for one parent to stay home, which honestly, isn't an option for many, especially single parents.

It's the ultimate rock and hard place of these tough financial times. I call it the ultimate because it has a far greater impact than meatless meals or a missed evening out. It's a matter of who is going to be raising our children and in what environment?

On the other hand, there are those navigating this dilemma more easily. Those who can afford to pay a decent wage for childcare or can afford to stay home. There are those with extended family in a position to help. There are those who can find the select care takers (more often stay-at-home parents themselves) who ask for little money for the nurturing environment they provide.

But what about all the other parents? Or more concerning, what about all of the other children? The ones who will go to crowded day cares and get ear infections and pink eye this winter. Or will be left home alone a little too young and with a little too much processed food to keep them company because genuinely good parents can't afford the alternative. Is there nothing that can be done for them?

Coming Soon!

Mother's Day 2014

Baby Dominic is almost here!

Crockpot Freezer Meals: Ranch Chicken Tacos

I love Crock Pot freezer meals. Primarily, dump chicken recipes. For those of you that don't know, dump chicken recipes are when you literally dump the ingredients and chicken in the Crock Pot and let it cook. The appeal  for me is that you can, instead, dump the ingredients in to a freezer bag, store it in the freezer until you need an easy dinner, and them toss it in the Crock Pot.

It's handy because it doesn't have to be completely thawed before you cook it (I can never remember to take meat out to thaw until it's too late). You can either let it thaw slightly in the fridge for a couple hours, or run it under warm water for 2-3 minutes, just enough to loosen it up a bit so the chicken can be laid out evenly.

Crock Pot Ranch Chicken Tacos

4-5 boneless chicken breast (or whatever chicken part is on sale, as long as it's boneless)

packet of taco seasoning

packet of Hidden Valley Ranch Mix

1/4 Cup of water

1/4 cup of ranch dressing (Do not add to the Crock Pot with the rest of the ingredients)

Dump the chicken, taco seasoning, ranch mix, and water in a Gallon size freezer bag. Mix together, flatten, and freeze until needed.

Thaw the contents just enough so the chicken pieces can be separated. Spray your Crock Pot with non-stick spray. Dump contents into the Crock Pot and cook on Low for 4-5 hours. NOTE: If you choose not to freeze the ingredients ahead of time, that's fine; just cook on low for 3-4 hrs.

Put the chicken pieces in a bowl and shred them. Add the ranch dressing. Return chicken to the crock pot and cook for 10 mins.

Put it in a tortilla and add your favorite toppings! We like to use to make quesadillas.

Sensory Bins

I would like to begin this post with the disclaimer that I have not yet made my own sensory bin, nor have I had a chance to use one with the kids. That being said, I have fallen in love with the idea of sensory bins and couldn't wait to share. All the pictures link back to the original site to make sure the blogger/momma responsible gets full credit.

I have fallen in love with the (again, not so new) idea of sensory bins. One of the things I love about them the most is that the possibilities are endless. For those of you who aren't so familiar with the concept, its basically a container that you fill will things to engage you child's senses. It gives them a chance to feel different textures, different colors, and even different smells.

For infants, a sensory bin ideally has only a few different items, so as not to overwhelm them and lose the appeal. As children get older, your bin can have a theme, and even include letters, numbers, and sight words. Below are some of the ideas that I'm most fond of.


Ocean sensory bin


Dinosaur sensory bin. This one is one of my very favorite. I know a few little boys that would spend forever playing with this.


Candy construction sensory bin


Muddy race car sensory bin


Dino dig sensory bin


Outerspace sensory bin


Under construction sensory bin


Ocean bowl sensory bin


Ocean sand sensory bin


Dollar store sensory bin. The definition of thrifty parenting!


Insect sensory bin


Monster sensory bin


Gardening sensory bin


I know this is another construction bin, but I think this one is probably my favorite. Perfect for older boys. And I like that there are different materials to dig in; it's not all just sand.


Shoveling letters sensory bin. Yay playing with the alphabet.

Some bins are best used outside, or at the very least, not on the carpet. It can be really simple or really elaborate. And not every bin has to be completely different. You can add elements and take them away to create a different experience, making it see like they're getting a whole new toy. Be sure to me creative, be daring, and have fun!

Super Easy Crab Pie

I used to make crab pockets, which involved stuffing crescent rolls and lots of oozing, and just annoying things in general. So this time I tried something a little bit different. Hope you enjoy! 

I started by layering the bottom of a pie pan with crescent rolls. I'm glad I used a glass pan, because it allowed me to see when the bottom crust was done so there was no guess work on the timing.

Then I chopped up the crab meat and mixed it with the cream cheese. It's up to you how small you want to chop it. I personally prefer large chunks.

Pour the crab mixture in the pie pan and spread evenly.

Then sprinkle shredded cheese over top of it. Colby jack is my all time favor shredded cheese, but you can use sharp cheddar as well depending on your preference.

Now we're ready to bake!

Ta-da!

Super Easy Crab Pie

Tube of crescent roll dough

8oz crab meat or imitation crab meat (chopped)

8 oz cream (cheese softened)

1/4 cup shredded colby jack cheese

Preheat the oven to 375 degrees. Using non-stick spray, lightly coat an 8 inch round pie pan.

Lay unrolled crescent rolls in the bottom of the pan and press flate, forming one solid layer of dough with no empty spaces. In a bowl, mix crab meat and cream cheese. Spread the crab mixture evenly over the dough. Spread shredded cheese on top.

Bake in the oven 13-15 mins or until cheese on top starts to brown.

Enjoy!

Fostering Independence in a Child

One thing that I've found varies greatly from child to child, especially in early years, is their amount of independence. Working as a nanny, where your job is to, well...take care of the children, it's interesting how different this can be for children of the same age group.

I've seen two-year-olds pour their own milk and four-year-olds who can't put on their own socks and everything in between. When my brother, age ten, came to stay with me for a week he was completely dumb-founded when I told him to microwave his own hot dog.

So what is it that makes some kids seem so capable and others so independent? Like always, it comes down to parenting. It's often easier to just do things ourselves than to let our kids take twice as long do the same task, incorrectly at that. We can spend the morning fighting with our kids to pick up their toys, or we could take ten minutes and do I ourselves.

Fostering independence in our children is fairly simple, but not easy. It requires restraint, patients, and a lot grace, for both mommy and child.

Give your child choices. Independence is all about thinking and acting for themselves. But how can kids be expected to make good choices if they haven't had any practice? Giving them free reign can be overwhelming. "Do you want to wear your red shirt or blue shirt today?" Making simple choices like that can drive kids to want to take control.

Give your child the opportunity to be independent. Encourage them to do things for themselves. Little tasks like setting the table or putting clothes in the washing machine will give them a  sense of pride that they will want more of.

And most importantly, if it's not dangerous or destructive, it will be okay. The more independence they get, the more they'll want to "be a helper." They want to get their own water, yes the floor might get wet, but it will dry. They want to pour their own cereal, it might end up on all over the table, but you can always buy more cereal. Just know, that in the end, it will be worth it.

Chocolate Chip Cookie Bars

So I used to be obsessed with baking cookies. Then life got busy and I find myself completely ready to prepare cookies, but the actual baking part gets pretty tedious when you're making six dozen cookies twelve at a time. 

My solution? Cookie bars! All the goodness of cookies with only 1 baking cycle  

Chocolate chip Cookie Bars

Ingredients:

2 1/4 cup flour

1 tsp baking soda

1/4 tsp salt 

1 cup unsalted butter (softened)

3/4 cup granulated sugar

3/4 cup brown sugar

1 tsp vanilla extract

2 large eggs

2 cups chocolate chips

Preheat the oven to 350 degrees. Grease a 9x13 baking dish. 

In a medium bowl, mix flour, baking soda, and salt. Set aside. 

In a large bowl, beat butter, sugar, brown sugar, and vanilla until creamy. Beat in eggs one at a time. Gradually mix in flour mixture. Fold in chocolate chips. 

Pour dough in the prepared 9x13 pan and spread evenly. Dough will be thick and sticky. Bake for 20-25 minutes, or until edges are golden brown and center is slightly firm. Let cool completely in pan and cut into bars. 

Enjoy!

Quiet Books

Though I have a great knack for not finishing projects, I do love textile arts. Sewing, crochet, needle work, etc. But you can only make so many blankets, and with a little boy, you don't even get to make sundresses. What's a mommy to do?

Quite book! I found this (not so new) concept on Pinterest and I must say, it's probably the COOLEST idea ever in the history of forever.

What is this crazy good idea? It's really quite simple. It's a fabric book you can create (or buy if you really want) with little busy activities to keep the kiddos entertained and (ideally) quiet.

A lot of the pages include fine motor skills like buttons, snaps, and tying, and also matching and sorting.

If you want a tutorial, this woman really has a great one. But you can adapt your quiet book any way you want.

Your book can be adapted for different age groups. It can include shoe tying, color matching, putting all the animals in the zoo, etc.

I like the concept because it leaves a lot of room for imagination and creativity. If you use rings to bind your book, and can add and remove pages as your child grows or needs something new. This is also a good resource for quiet book ideas. For more page ideas, check out the links below:

Quiet book – 150 and more ideas, tutorials and patterns
Sawdust and Embyros: My Momma's Quiet Book
And Next Comes L: Pinterest: Quiet books
Disney Baby: 8 Cute DIY Quiet Books
The Inspired Home-World Wide Wednesday: Quiet Book Ideas

Melissa and Doug and Friends

All my readings on the Montessori Method and fostering curiosity in children has caused me to encounter the names Melissa and Doug quite a bit. I looked into it a bit further. For those of you that don't know, Melissa and Doug is a toy company synonymous with high quality low/no tech toys. Thing like trains, floor puzzles, wooden blocks, and other classics.

They're quite a reputable company, with very little advertising and promotion, the focus is on quality, not trends. It's a great notions. Let's unplug our little ones, put away the apps, and play school and dress up like to good old days. But like most things in life and parenting, that's easier said than done.

For starters, Melissa and Doug toys are awfully expensive. I don't thing they're overpriced. The price tag has to match the labor, cost, and quality of the product. But something plastic and flashing with a AA battery the makes train sounds can be cheaper and even more enticing than a wooden one with four wheels and a track.

So where does that leave parents? Active toys create an inactive child; inactive toys create an active child. How easy and shameless is it to throw in a video or Wii game when we need to get the dishes done or pay bills or call the bank? But what are we giving our kids when we allow them to be entertained rather than learn to entertain and grow?

It's a slippery slope. Children immersed in technology lose the ability to entertain themselves, create, and imagine. But does that mean we have to fly off the handle with $15 ten piece puzzles and a padlock on the TV remote.

I think the answer there, like most things, lies in moderation. The occasional cartoon before bed or smartphone game while waiting in a restaurant won't turn our kids into zombies.

But I think that Melissa and Doug are onto something with their back to basics approach. I'd like to think that educational play and creative exploration are more important than dirty dishes anyway....just maybe not more important than paying bills.

A Mother and Her Son

I've said for a while that 3-year-old boys are my favorite creatures. I dare you to find anything more intense, daring, curious, or terrifying than a 3-year-old boy.

But my husband and I said that a little girl would be the best addition to our family...so naturally we're expecting a little boy. There's so much advice our there about how to raise a gentleman, how to prepare a boy to be a husband, and how to instill in him values that the woman in his life will appreciate. I find it kind of shocking that's I should be prepping my little boy for another woman before I've had my fair share. And in reverse, I doubt we would embrace an article like how to raise your daughter to be a good wife so readily in this day and age.

But I must regretfully admit I read everyone of these that I find. There is a part of me that is aware that boys are different from girls, and an even bigger part of me that is conscious of the fact that a traditional family can be understood to a child as the way things work instead of the way we choose to make our family work. And I'd like to think if I was having a girl I would spend an equal amount of time and effort plotting ways to empower her and encourage her sense of self.

Right now, my hope for my son is that I can show him how to be kind, giving, and gentle when the moment calls for it. I also acknowledge that being tough, strong, and fearless have their place, but something tells me those will come much more naturally.

I will teach my son to love freely and openly and with his whole heart

I will make my son do his own laundry because he may not always need to throw a perfect spiral, but he will always need clean underwear

I will encourage my son to create what ever his heart desires, whether it's beautiful or terrifying

I will kiss him goodnight for as long as he lets me because the only thing worse that a child feeling they don't need you, is a child  feeling you don't need them

I will make him eat what's for dinner so he will never expect to have a short-order cook in the house

I will teach him to express his emotions because he will always have them, and there's no use denying that

I will show him how strong women can be in hopes that he will not settle for a weak one

And above all else, I will give him the gift of both knowledge and faith so that he can never be disarmed and he will never be alone

We Don't Lie to Our Children

I worked as a nanny for the S family for a while, which was one of my most rewarding jobs and the most difficult to leave. I remember on day one, Momma S sat me down and told me about things I needed to know about their family: The kids can eat whenever they're hungry, no foul language, and we never lie to our children.

Really? Never? It seemed so simple, and yet so foreign. I didn't know any other parent who could say they never lie to their children. Everyone I knew was notorious for saying. We'll come back tomorrow, we're all out of cookies, or If you don't eat your vegetables you'll never grow up.

It's such an obvious notions. Be honest with your children (save things that are inappropriate for their age or part of childhood ignorance like the tooth fairy or the birds and the bees). And if your honest with your children, they will trust you. But what does it look like in practice.

Children who have never seen or felt dishonesty, will not have a dishonest heart. That's not say to say that shame or fear will never cause them to keep secrets or tell fibs. But at the same time, truthfulness and forth coming will be the norm, and deceit will be uncomfortable at best.

But it's sometimes easier said than done. It's so much easier to tell a child we're out of cookies, than to try to explain that cookies are not a good snack right now. And it's such a quick fix to tell a child if they get in the car right now we can go to the park later. There's a reason not everyone is so keen to jump on this band wagon. And not just because it's too hard. It's because some parents feel it's not worth the trade off. White lies won't create a demon child or making them think mommy is always crying wolf. And sometimes it's difficult when a four-year-old complains, but you said.... and you have to stick to your word.

However, if a child knows they can trust their parent 100% of the time, then it will come in handy when it counts. When you say you can't play in the street because it's dangerous and you could get hurt. They know you mean it. And you can tell them we need to eat vegetables because they are important for our body and keep us healthy, and even though vegetables will always suck, they will know that they keep us healthy and there will be no doubt.

Our kids get so many messages from the world around them. They need to be able to believe ours.